Chairman of The Bored

I'm having one of those evenings. I've had so little sleep this week , I'm restless, I'm bored. I'm not happy with tonights viewing opportunities (57 channels and there's nothing on).

The best thing on offer is Medium - which is so ridiculously far fetched - that handsome, intelligent, sensitive husband is a figment of her (and the female scriptwriters) imagination. And a repeat of my beloved West Wing - of which I own the box sets and have watched a dozen times each.

And so I go to The Collection.

I've got 342 (and growing) DVD's that cover pretty much every genre - in fact one day I plan to organise them that way - so whatever I'm in the mood for it has to be there.

Right?

Wrong.

In terms of TV series there are definite gaps on the shelf

No Twin Peaks (videos only - no longer prepared to watch vhs. But how can I live without it?)
No X Files (I can't tell you why I haven't bought this. I don't want to admit to myself that I am inches away from attending a science fiction convention, or that I still dream about Mulder)
No Six Feet Under (why oh why? Season One was so so breathtaking)
No Buffy, no Moonlighting, no Northern Exposure (I lent that to someone...You know who you are)
No Tales of the City (ah Laura Linney, you're a treasure)

No Seinfeld, no Frasier, no League of Gentlemen, no Fawlty Towers, no King of the Hill, no Aeon Flux, no South Park (I know! I can't believe that either!)

And no News Radio (actually truth be told all I want to watch right now is News Radio)

As for films I'm in the mood for and do not have

Do The Right Thing (because I'm going to see Inside Man tomorrow and want to remind myself what is good about Spike Lee).

Near Dark (the greatest vampire movie ever made, I was sure I had this, but no no no)

Flying High (piss funny genius)

Stripes (see above)

Bill and Teds Excellent Adventure (where is my video card anyway...)

While searching for that one perfect DVD that will make my night complete I came across 12 films that still have the plastic wrap on them, that haven't even been cracked open -

State and Main, The Mosquito Coast, All That Jazz, Dead Ringers, Poltergiest, Old School, High Tide, The Comfort of Strangers, Catch 22, Edward Scissorhands, Shawn of the Dead, Diner.

nup. no good.

The shortlist for tonight is now

American Beauty (just for that one scene - do you know the one I'm thinking of?)


Gosford Park (Because I'm seeing Clive Owen tomorrow)

The Royal Tenenbaums (when in doubt go to your top ten that's what I say)

Down By Law (because I didn't know I had this, and it's so so very good)



You know what. The West Wing will be on in 30 minutes. I give up.

I need to get a life, or a date, or a book, or sleep. Perhaps not in that order.